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Does The Difference in Age Between Parent And Child Really Matter?

My girlfriends and I often discuss the future in terms of what ages we want to start having children. I personally want 5 (3 girls and 2 boys), so I feel that I need to start a little early on, especially because I want them every two years. So, I've always said that I want to start around 26ish. My reasoning: I don't want there to be a major age gap between my children and myself. My mother is 30 years older than I am, and sometimes I feel like she can't reach me on my level just because of the age gap between us. My friends think that age has nothing to do with it, but rather the effort that the parents invest in trying to reach their kids on their levels. I personally think that 30 was too late for my mother to have me, and wish that she was just a little closer in age to me. Do you think that "too late" exsists when it comes to the age gap between mother and child, as long as she is still physically able to have children?

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Permalink Reply by Danielle on November 22, 2009 at 10:02am: Interesting question. It really has to be looked at on an individual basis though. I wouldn't say that all 30 something or even 40 something moms with younger children don't relate or waited too long. I know personally I have a younger sister that is 12 years younger than I. The way she is being raised is completely different I think because my mother is older and certainly not as strict with her. Little sister gets away with things that would have certainly gotten me slapped or grounded or what have you. In this case I think it is directly related to my mothers age when she had her (39). I think as a mother you need to be in a place where you can very involved and provides strong guidance regardless of your age. I think the age gap between children influences upbringing and how siblings interact. I have an older sister who is 4 years older (profile pic) and we talk everyday and are very close. My younger sister however I don't really relate to because we came up differently and we dont have much in common age wise. I think the "too late" gap might be between siblings and not mother and child. Depends on the person.; ▶ Reply to This

Permalink Reply by Imago Dei on November 22, 2009 at 6:30pm: Great way to look at it! I have a little brother who is 10 years younger than I am, and he is most definitely being raised differently than I was. I have a twin brother, so sometimes I think that my parents are just tired from raising me and my twin, that they let our little brother raise himself. I mean, I love him, but I feel like he's my son more than my brother, and I certainly can't relate to him or talk to him in the way that I relate and talk to my twin. I guess when parents are a little on the older side, it helps to have siblings in the interum. But I'm the oldest, so there's no one above me but my parents. I often find myself adopting 'sisters' a little older than I am, because I want the slightly older female advice and etc. you know? Like there are some things that I just won't talk about with my mother because I just don't want that old fashion opinion. I mean, she does well with where she's at, but sometimes I just wish she was a little younger...; ▶ Reply to This